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Megadeth - Cryptic Writings
1997 Capitol Records
Soulfly - Dark Ages

Track Listing:
 1. Trust
2. Almost Honest
3. Use The Man
4. Mastermind
5. The Disintegrators
6. I'll Get Even
7. Sin
8. A Secret Place
9. Have Cool Will Travel
10. She-Wolf
11. Vortex
12. FFF

Line-Up:
Vocals:  Dave Mustaine
Guitars:  Dave Mustaine, Marty Friedman
Bass:  Dave Ellefson
Drums:  Nick Menza

Website:  www.megadeth.com

Horatio's Rating:  D
Overall Rating:  D

Also be sure to read:
Megadeth - Rust In Peace by Horatio
 Megadeth - So Far, So Good...So What? by Horatio
 Megadeth - The System Has Failed by Horatio
 Nativity In Black:  A Tribute To Black Sabbath by Shev
Soulfly - Dark Ages (Dave Ellefson) by Horatio

Horatio's Review:
 It's hard to believe, but Megadeth were once poised to break through to the mainstream like Metallica.  'Countdown To Extinction' might have prefaced Megadeth's eventual demise, but it actually reached number two on Billboard, going double platinum.  'Youthanasia' pushed an even more commercial sound, but was a relative flop, Megadeth hardly the flavour of the day in 1994 (and what did they expect with shitters like 'Victory', 'Family Tree', 'Tout Le Monde', 'Blood Of Heroes', 'I Thought I Knew It All' and 'Black Curtains').  When they showed their faces again in 1997 the results were even worse, as they foolishly attempted to blend their newer more radio friendly style with painfully bad old style thrashers.

This album is a true turkey.  It was produced by genius guitar player Dan Huff, who is more known for AOR than metal.  But this isn't really metal.  More the sound of a stale act, desperate to rekindle past glories.  There is so much filler, that like 'So Far, So Good', it should have been an e.p.  What excuse was there for 'Have Cool Will Travel'?  Or 'I'll Get Even'?  How about 'Almost Honest'?  Can anyone even remember how these songs go?  I can't until I listen to it.  I do know that 'FFF' and 'The Disintegrators' are joke thrash, and 'Mastermind' is a 'Countdown To Extinction' rip off.  All you really need to know about how far these stiffs had sunk is by looking at the band photos.  Smiling, happy, faggots...Nick Menza kicked out...Mustaine still addicted to smack...Friedman going pop...Was this really the same lineup that produced tear ups like 'Take No Prisoners'??? 

Song summaries include...

  1. Trust - That opening drum roll is quite intense isn't it?  You knew the thrash was back!  Somewhat of a radio favourite back in '98 this was.  There's a bad Beatles type interlude followed by an acoustic guitar shambles halfway through.  Trying too hard.  C

  2. Almost Honest - There's nothing resembling metal here.  Just some mediocre hard rock, with too much studio gadgetry.  If it was any other band it might work, but not for Megadeth.  C-

  3. Use The Man - That '60's song in the intro is better than the actual song itself.  There's this annoying keyboard nonsense that infiltrates the sound constantly and it's amusing to hear Mustaine sounding mean when the music is so piss poor.  Near the end there's some gay fast bit.  C

  4. Mastermind - In an attempt to throw in every style possible, Dave tries to relive the 'Countdown To Extinction' days, complete with deranged background vocals.  There's no balls evident, it goes nowhere, falling asleep...  D

  5. The Disintegrators - Isn't it a coincidence that this was the first song I heard while previewing this in 1997?  I bought it, rushed home and assumed the whole thing was thrash.  When the dust settled I then realized that this was a piece of shit thrasher, too.  The production is too thin, just not tough enough.  C

  6. I'll Get Even - What happened to Mustaine?  The loudmouth who thrived on his madman image is reduced to half hearted, almost soothing slices of melodic rock.  Thanks, Huff.  D

  7. Sin - How much shit can one man take?  'Complete life in disarray', sings Dave.  He must have been.  How can people say 'Load' was bad compared to this?  D

  8. A Secret Place - There's a secret place where Dave likes to go, Marty gets down on his knees and blows.  I hide from Nick who tries to find me, scary thing that's right behind me.  He raped me I must confess, I can't explain how I got this mess (on my face).  D

  9. Have Cool Will Travel - Quite possibly the most forgotten Megadeth track ever, if that's possible.  F

  10. She-Wolf - Dave ups the ante with some old school metal.  He sounds like he's forcing himself with his weak vocals.  Again no crunch, anyone listening would have given up by now.  D

  11. Vortex - A carbon copy of the above.  More suspect metal filler that isn't even better than the commercial stuff.  Dave tries to prove he's still true metal with lyrics like, 'as medieval as Merlin' and 'Lucifer in transition', but with mid-paced music, it's not forceful.  C

  12. FFF - I really think this is the worst attempt at thrash ever.  It reminds me of a kid learning guitar and trying to learn chord progression and getting his fingers around the strings in a cohesive manner.  That's what this sounds like.  Clearly Dave and Farty Marty had forgotten how to play thrash riffs, so laboured and tortured are their crappy attempts at speed.  The mind boggles that these four poofters once conjured up 'Holy Wars' and 'Poison Was The Cure'.  That's what you get for abandoning thrash.  F

Horatio's Rating:  D

Discography (last updated 11.4.05):
Last Rites demo - 1984
Killing Is My Business...And Business Is Good - 1985
Peace Sells...But Who's Buying - 1986
Wake Up Dead EP - 1986
Anarchy In The U.K. EP - 1988
Liar EP - 1988
Mary Jane EP - 1988
So Far, So Good...So What? - 1988
Holy Wars...Punishment Due EP - 1990
No More Mr. Nice Guy split 7" with Dead On - 1990
Rust In Peace - 1990
Hangar 18 EP - 1991
Maximum Megadeth EP - 1991
Countdown To Extinction - 1992
Foreclosure Of A Dream EP - 1992
Symphony Of Destruction EP - 1992
Angry Again EP - 1993
MegaBox box set - 1993
Megadeth Live EP - 1993
Skin O' My Teeth EP - 1993
Sweating Bullets EP - 1993
The Story Of Megadeth EP - 1994
Train Of Consequences EP - 1994
Youthanasia - 1994
A Tout Le Monde EP - 1995
Hidden Treasures - 1995
The MegaBox box set - 1995
Cyberarmy Exclusive Tracks EP - 1996
Almost Honest EP - 1997
Cryptic Writings - 1997
Live Trax EP - 1997
The Originals box set - 1997
Special Limited Edition EP - 1997
Trust EP - 1997
A Secret Place EP - 1998
Cryptic Sounds (No Voices In Your Head) EP - 1998
Live Trax II EP - 1998
Use The Man EP - 1998
Crush 'Em EP - 1999
Risk - 1999
Breadline EP - 2000
Capitol Punishment - 2000
Kill The King EP - 2000
Moto Psycho EP - 2001
The World Needs A Hero - 2001
Rude Awakening - 2002
Still, Alive...And Well? - 2002
Blackmail The Universe/Kick The Chair EP - 2004
Die Dead Enough EP - 2004
Hell Wasn't Built In A Day box set - 2004
The System Has Failed - 2004
Greatest Hits:  Back To The Start - 2005
Of Mice And Men EP - 2005