Dream Evil - The Book Of Heavy Metal
2004 Century Media

Track Listing:
1. The Book Of Heavy Metal (March Of The Metallians)
2. Into The Moonlight
3. The Sledge
4. No Way
5. Crusader's Anthem
6. Let's Make Rock
7. Tired
8. Chosen Twice
9. M.O.M.
10. The Mirror
11. Only For The Night
12. Unbreakable Chain

Line-Up:
Vocals:  Niklas Isfeldt
Guitars:  Fredrik Nordstrom, Gus C
Bass:  Peter Stslfors
Drums:  Snowy Shaw

Website:  www.dreamevil.se

Horatio's Rating:  D
Average Album Rating:  D

Horatio's Review:
I should never have owned this album.  One Sunday last September I was sitting alone in my living room watching the Bears against the Vikings, enjoying my solitude and the plucky Bears resilience with Rex Grossman at the helm.  Out of nowhere a car pulled into the driveway.  All I could think was 'fuck off'.  I didn't recognize the car, maybe they had the wrong house.  But no.  Out stepped a fellow I used to work with some five years earlier.  I decided to hide behind the couch but was spotted in the act.  I let the fellow in reluctantly.  In his hand he held a CD.  I tried to watch the game while he rambled that this CD was the best heavy metal album he'd ever heard.  'I don't like the NFL', he mumbled, 'let's listen to this'.  You prick, I thought, I haven't seen you in five years and now you force this on me.

I tried to keep my eye on the game.  The Bears were losing.  All the while his eyes were permanently fixed on me as I put the CD into the computer.  Dream Evil, I had heard of them but not cared enough to listen to them.  'Come on man, eyes off the game!', I started the CD.  A grin was etched on his face as he STARED at me waiting for my reaction.  The music was crap Euro metal, trying to hard to be an 80's throwback, with Hammerfall-like worthlessness.  One track was titled 'M.O.M.'.  'That stands for Man Or Mouse', I was reliably informed.  I faked my enthusiasm for the album.  'Yeah this is top notch mate, I'll rip it and listen to it later'.  He stood defiant.  'No, you listen to it all!'  I did that.  Then he wanted to go outside and bask in the sunshine.  He filled me in on the last five years of his life.  In case I forgot Dream Evil he played it on his car stereo while we talked.  'Great isn't it? Best metal album ever!'

He told me his hopes, dreams and aspirations.  He was 41 now and earning eight dollars an hour.  The game was down to the last quarter.  I tried to hear the TV.  Sensing this he turned Dream Evil up a notch.  'This ones called 'Let's Make Rock'.  It's an anthem!  Man it's good to see you again Alvin, you're the only guy I've ever known with a love for metal like me!'  I tried to ditch him.  'Well I have to go to work later man, I should get some rest'.  He didn't hear me.  'So anyway this Dream Evil, I went to Best Buy and it was the last copy.  I picked it up gave it a chance...' 'AND GROSSMAN SCORES THE TOUCHDOWN.  BUT HE'S HURT!!'...'I couldn't believe it when I heard it.  Shit man it's all I've listened to for months....' THE BEARS ARE DOWN BY THREE, 25-22 WITH A MINUTE LEFT, JONATHAN QUINN IS IN FOR GROSSMAN!'...'well I suppose I'll leave you to it then.'  I heard those words only.  'Okay man, I'll see you later on then.'

He left.  I went inside.  He had butchered my day.  Quinn botched all four passes and the Bears lost.  Grossman was out for the year.  The Bears season was over before it began.  Still I had the greatest metal album of all time didn't I?  Thanks to my chum!  Right now I'm listening to it for the first time since that day, September 26th 2004, 1:30PM.  It's as bad as it was that day.  I saw him once more after that.  Right now he resides in my yard, buried with this CD.  (Footnote: Buried with another Bears season it appears)
Horatio's Rating:  D

Also be sure to read:
Mercyful Fate - In The Shadows (Snowy Shaw) by Uncle Meat

Discography (last updated 9.13.05):
Dragon Slayer - 2002
Children Of The Night EP - 2003
Evilized - 2003
The Book Of Heavy Metal - 2004
First Chapter EP - 2004